Learning to read

I'm Claire, a 7-year-old blue merle border collie, and I'm kind of bored these days.

Last week Monday, while playing with my favorite brother, Buzz, and my "other" brother, Flash, (eesh) I caught my front toenail in a tree root and ripped it out completely. TALK ABOUT PAIN!! At first, I thought Buzz had done something, so I set out to punish him appropriately. Luckily, Mom knew better, stopped me in my tracks, and proceeded to look me over. She cleaned out my toe and took me to the vet, where my foot was promptly bandaged, and the vet then told my mom that I was not allowed to exercise for at least *two weeks!!* What on EARTH is a border collie to do with two weeks off? I thought I was going to go crazy!

Of course, I did think about some options for my time off:
* I'd love to take a cross-country road trip to sheep country. Problem is, I can't drive; my legs are too short, and without opposable thumbs, working the steering wheel would be sketchy at best. Not to mention, the challenge of turning the key to start the engine in the first place. -sigh- so much for that idea.
* Then, I thought about redecorating the house. I would just love to have more indoor trees, and fluffy dog beds in every corner. Sheep print wallpaper also came to mind, but last time I went to Lowes, they told my mom that I was no longer allowed inside - something about big dogs?

So, since my mom has been working on teaching me to read flash cards, I thought, "why not start a blog?" Oh sure, my mom thinks that all I know of reading is sit, down, wave and stand. I have to be sure she doesn't find out about this blog, or she'll have me reading and performing all kinds of silly tricks in front of her friends. I am so *not* into Letterman's stupid pet tricks.
So, here I am, blogging. How do I type, you might ask? Well, it's not easy, but it is possible by using my toenails - all but the one that is missing, that is. For now, I'm just using my left paw, until I finally get the bandage off of my right paw. Then things will go more quickly.
Uh oh, I hear Mom getting home. Gotta go before she sees me.